Trees!

When I was about 5 years old, I was playing in the kitchen while my mom was in the basement doing laundry.

I was generally a pretty well-behaved and smart kid, so she didn't think much of it when she heard pounding on the floor (which, for her, would have been the ceiling). She figured I was just jumping around.

When she came upstairs, she was horrified to find that I had hammered about 20 nails into the kitchen floor. "Look Mom, trees!" I exclaimed. "I made a forest!".

I pray that my kids are smarter than I was.

Hello, Awkward Years!

The boy child lost his second front tooth.

Twitter Is Easy

I'm starting to see the appeal of Twitter: It's easy.

Unlike blogging, where some sort of thought/insight is required, Twitter only requires that you state what you're doing. "On my way to the race". There, I contributed.

Yesterday, an old lady at the grocery store decided that I was a "fucker" because I "took all the goddamn sweet corn". I'm not going to scurry home and blog about this. In fact, being called a "fucker" is so common for me that it's essentially a non-event. I probably would have forgotten about it before firing up Blogger. However, I was able to tweet this event from my Blackberry.

I also like the fact that the past-tense of "tweet" is "twat". OK, maybe not, but I can dream!

It's human nature to do as little work as possible to accomplish a goal. It takes very little work to be part of the Twitter "community". Much less than is involved in blogging.

Don't get me wrong, it's fun. It really is. However, there ends up being a lot of "filler" posts. "Eating breakfast". Ok, then. But, that's the spirit of Twitter.

Twitter also seems to be using some cheesy-ass servers that are constantly overloaded, resulting in the "Fail Whale".

They really need to get their shit together there. Otherwise, it's pretty idiot-proof.

I don't feel that Twitter is the life-altering technology that the media wants it to be, but it can be fun. And for most of us, that's probably good enough.

Brush With Moderate Greatness

There's a cool story in the St. Cloud Times about my wife's second cousin. 16 years old and he just signed a pro hockey contract. Not bad at all. Nevermind that I've only met the kid 3 times...

This reminded me of another brush with greatness that I had.

My first car was a 1986 Chevy Cavalier. It was crappy, and was soon replaced by a Blazer. This car also served as my little sister's first car, and when she was done with it my mom sold it to some kids who wanted to put it in the demolition derby at the county fair.

With a giant bear taped to the roof, "The Cav" was almost immediately hit hard from the side and flipped over onto its roof, at which point it started on fire. Things looked bleak.

The fire was extinguished, the car flipped back on to it's wheels, and the tenacious little bastard went on to win the demo derby!

Now that's hardcore. I'm certain I had something to do with it.

Relaxing Is Hard Work!

I'm working from home today because I'm so exhausted from my nice, relaxing weekend!

We loaded up the family truckster and headed out to Franz's cabin on Friday afternoon. Just as I was about to leave, he e-mailed me and told me to bring my bike. I briefly debated pretending I didn't get the e-mail, I think because I was nervous to see just how bad I suck now. However, I relented and loaded my road bike on the rack.

Franz and I went for a 40-minute ride. We got to some hills, and I wanted to test my legs a little bit, so I started half-wheeling him. He dropped me. On his track bike. In a 94" gear. Fuck my life.

Overall, though, it felt good to get back on the horse...er...bike.

We then hopped into the boat for some wakeboarding. My first run I just spent some time getting acquainted to the bigger wake on his boat. It's probably 3x the size of the wake on my boat, so it took some getting used to. Then I took a short break before getting back on the water to attempt a flip. What a fucking disaster! Fortunately for you, there's video evidence floating around somewhere. I'll find it and post it soon.

Franz attempted a flip as well, but somehow pulled a muscle in his ass on the first attempt.

By this time I was pretty beat up from crashing hard (just because it's water doesn't mean it feels good), so it was time for margaritas. I loves me some tequila.

After a sufficient amount of liquor, I tried some more wakeboard flips and - gasp - almost landed a couple. There's something to be said for 'boarding under the influence. No inhibitions = bigger air.

Saturday we got up and went for another 40-minute ride. I felt a lot better on the bike, so that was mildly encouraging.

We then went wakeboarding again, and again I almost landed a couple flips in between epic crashes. I'm not quite there, but I'll get it. Oh yes, I will get it. Franz 'boarded for about 3 minutes before injuring his biceps. Poor old dude is falling apart!

After pulling the kids around on the tube, Franz and I scurried out the door to hit up Donimator's pad for UFC 100. It was a great time!

Sunday was supposed to be rainy so we stayed home. Of course, it wasn't rainy, so I got to spend a beautiful (hot) day cleaning my garage and mowing the lawn. Boo.

I crashed out early last night and slept in this morning. Gotta rest up for more relaxing next weekend!

Mighty Minnow Hunter

Goals

I'm someone who, traditionally, needs to set goals in order to be motivated to do anything. Anything at all. Ya know, other than sit around like a bump on a stump. When I started cycling 7 years ago (has it really been that long???), these goals basically set themselves. Pick an event, train for it. Nevermind that I wasn't particularly successful early in my career. I was motivated and determined, and that was enough.

As I got more serious, the goals became more specific, which made my motivation more focused. Break 12 seconds. Get my Cat 3 upgrade. Get my Cat 2 upgrade. Win the state match sprints. Repeat. Team Sprint track record. Get on the podium at Elite Nationals. Break the track record in the flying 200.

Since I've been laid up, I've had to set goals that seem minor to everyone else, but are significant in my mind. Walk without crutches. Wear normal pants. Walk normal. Rollerblade. Wakeboard. Pedal.

Not being able to be competitive in any type of athletics has been a real eye-opener. Luckily, I've been really busy with work, and have had several aggeressive project completion dates to work towards.

Lately, I've been lifting weights pretty consistently, with the somewhat vague goal of "look good naked". I'm very un-aero.

I guess I don't really know how to just float through life, but for the first time since I can remember I don't feel any sort of internal pressure pushing me towards something.

It's actually been quite refreshing. I've spending more time with my family, doing more varied activities, and am just more relaxed in general. I still can't manage to keep up on my fucking lawn, though.

Hmmm. When I starte writing this I felt like I had a point to make. I guess not. Oh well, I'm off to try to land a flip on the wakeboard.

I Never Thought I'd Say This, But...

...Follow me on Twitter.

This is where I'll post things that aren't significant enough to blog, but are still significant enough to be amusing.

Just do it. You know you want to...

Looks Like A Fucking Sandwich To Me

Stupid Rain

Stop making my grass grow!