Why can't I fight the compulsion to say inappropriate things?
Today, my Director at work took us all out to lunch. Of course, I end up sitting right next to him. The first thing I say is, "Last time I was here it took 90 minutes to get crappy tasting food and one guy who was with us got food poisoning." Like he wants to know that.
Then, about halfway through the meal, there's an awkward silence. Inappropriate Man to the rescue! "So, my dog shit in my closet this morning." The silence is now significantly more awkward. "Stunk up the whole room," I say. Nice work.
Then, of course, I'm the only freakin' person who orders dessert. Everyone sits and stares at me for like 10 minutes while I cram a huge piece of cheesecake into my mouth. I also said something about killing the first MF'er who tried to snag a bite of it.
Well, at least I don't have to worry about getting promoted!
3 comments:
To cap it off - do like I do and as soon as you get back to your desk, remove your shoes and socks. It works pretty well to keep people out of your cubicle.
Good luck with those promotions.
You are my hero, I bite my tongue way to much.
Post a Comment