Tardville

There seems to be an alarmingly increasing trend of people randomly driving into the ditch. No spin-out marks, just straight tire tracks. Into the ditch. Sometimes right in the middle of town. Winter has been upon us for a couple months now, so I would have hoped to see people driving with some common sense. Like my grandpa used to say, "common sense isn't that common". OK, maybe it was Voltaire that said that.

I've done a poor job at documenting my "finds" with my camera phone. Partly because the people who are in the ditch glare at me when I'm taking pictures of them, but mostly because I'm just too slow to get the shot.

Only yesterday, after dropping Max of at school, I witnessed a blatant lapse in judgement. A prissy-looking woman in a conversion van with pimpin' rims forced her way in front of me to get out of the parking lot. As we were waiting at the next stop sign, she clearly got impatient. We were on a 2-lane road with no shoulder. There was maybe a 2 foot buffer between the car in front of her and the ditch. Undeterred, she put on her right blinker and drove directly into the ditch.

I couldn't believe my eyes. I pulled up next to where she was stuck in 3 feet of snow and just stared at her, shaking my head. She flipped me off. I tried to take her picture, because I thought it would be hilarious, but I dropped my phone on the floor and couldn't locate it hastily.

Last night on my way home from the ski hill I arrived at a T in the road and saw a pickup 20 yards straight ahead, having launched off the end of the road and into a field after being unable to stop on the icy roads.

I've had several sightings of people who tried to get into a turn lane, got one wheel in the snow plow drift, and got stuck right there on the side of the road, but those aren't nearly as fun to talk about as the middle-of-nowhere-ditch-goer-inners. I just made that word up. I'm like Webster (the dictionary guy, not the kid from the 80's TV show).